Watt is the unit of Power??

how can i live a dream, if i dont have any

watt can i do if life happens to me 

if its honesty, i honestly accept that i've never been honest

if its bravery, i boldy accept that i am coward

if its confidence, then i confidenly say "I CAN NOT DO IT"

but cant say, the world sees, and we care about the world all the more

though deep inside, its a wild un-controlled river of "PESSIMISM" that flows

i fake it, i am confident and damn i am good at that

its a guilt that will ever lie, that will never die

that i fake it, yes its all fake, that i laugh, i am good, i am happy

it usually takes over, then i say "I AM SORRY, I CAN NOT DO IT"

watt do i work for, if i have no desires no interests

i am not competitive, neither am i competing

nor i've joined any race, except the "HUMAN RACE" (so called)

every body around me is better than me

"i exist only because i exist"

it hurts though, i am flesh and blood, and the only thing i care for is my flesh and blood

i've never seen such "self centered" a being as me, nor will i ever see

i've no emotional attachements to nothing, nobody 

and when i say no-body and nothing, i mean it

i hold no responsibility nor do i want to hold any

it may seem exaggerated, after all this, mentioned above, but i think too

in fact tooo much, 

but the only thing i've thought the most about is me

every morning i hope something better out of me 

every next morning i have to hope the same 

if i started this life with -1, after all these years i am still there

if this is persistance, then i am consitently im-persistent

one "silver lining", i am very low on self confidence. and the most i expect out of me 

so i dont bother people with expectations, yes i dont have any

as i said, i think a lot, all but myself, can write a SAGA of my under achievements

but i am a dog, emotions vapourise quickly, i forget

i forget wen i am beaten, hold grudge for a moment a few, the scars on the body may persist

i forget wen i am kicked, wen i am let down, wen i am embarrased, wen i am disgraced

i forget the failure, so i never win, as if winning is watt that never matters to me

as a child winning was fun, but as i depart from "-1" i begun from, it no more matters 

i dont care, 

if that is being unique, then yes i am, 

though i remember wat people did good to me, because all i can see is quality in people (every body is better than me)

and then i compare, i want to rise, that disturbs my "-1" equilibrium

it makes my Lovely Life hell

after all i am flesh and blood, then i say "hey pal dont think a lot, stop thinking for a moment"

then i say "that's the most difficult thing to do and i like challenges as long as i am not involved" then i say "hey mate but that is life ... it is as natural as the breath u take, as natural as the food you eat" 

then i say "hey freind, but why isn't it FUN any more, it is fast depleting, like dews vanish when the sun is around"

then i want to say "NO MORE, buddy, you are impossible" 

why dont you just "GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE" 

then i am honestly dishonest, i dont FOLLOW wat i SAY

every morning .. i want to be honest with the one i think the most "ME"

and follow wat I SAY 

and "JUST GET ON WITH THE LIFE"