an initiative by Captain Vadi (Nilesh Tiwari) for a Balaghat Live our own version of Peepli Live and this one liner from कालू (Ashish Gupta) brings me back to my blog after .. so long .. but Hail Sarru ..
to start with - forgive us our spellings (any waz English is a democratic language:))
this is how it started
---------------------------
Do u ppl know tht Sarru was offered the role of NATHHA in Pepali Live but due to unavailablity of date's, as he was in a transitional phase from Tata Indicom to MTS and from Pune to Mumbai he refused Amir Khan politely.
But don't worry u all Sarru fans who can't wait to see his bellbottom pants(stitched for him exclusively by Chammen Tailors,Balaghat) and his gorgeous blond/kathha colored hair on silver screen. The wait is about to get over in Balaghat Live the sequel to Pepali Live......
To be continued...
P.S. Plz contibute generously to the story line with all ur wild imagination for Balaghat Live (Nissu especially u).
Regards
Vadi
----------------------------------- then on chat
me: yaar maine do saal se Blog karna chhod diyahai Vadi: Kya baat kar raha hai bhai
5:17 PM me: uske liye bahut free time chahiye
ghar par net nahi hai
Vadi: Duniya pe aisa julume kyu
me: ab to Nattha ghar aagaya hai
ab to net connection lunga hi nahi
5:18 PM nahi to pure ghar bhar me led hi led
Vadi: Hahahahah
LOL
ROTFLL
5:19 PM Yarr we will jus post the same thing which I wrote in the SMS
me: aauka
Vadi: And let the ppl comment on tht
5:20 PM As it is saala laundo ke beach koi
Connectivity he nahi raha gaiy hai
5:21 PM Every one is in his own world
5:30 PM me: "the film was rechristened Peepli Dead .. after Sarrus' inclusion"
5:32 PM Sarru can beat Rajni - Ball Street General
5:33 PM Sarru - who's Rajni
Whats Rajni can i fuck it??
Vadi: Hahahah
5:36 PM me: Sarru meets Rajni .. and says .. Tu kyu hai??
5:37 PM Vadi: Rajani say's ROBOT
me: Sarru can kill death ... Sarru stopped working . .and there was recession
Vadi: Sarru: do u hav a hole
5:38 PM me: Sarru farted and caused Great Depression
Vadi: Robot: how many do u need...
me: hahahhaa
Sarru .. the number you have + 1
5:39 PM Sarru bought the whole world for 1 rupee .. caused inflation
Vadi: Sarru: so tht I can spit my gutka/khhara in the other one
me: hahaha
5:40 PM then the song "Mehangai"
Vadi: Sarru: u see its called multitasking
5:41 PM me: yes I'll fuck u in the other holes and spit my kharra in the one left
Vadi: Sarru Saieeya to khu hi kamaat hai Khaara Dayan khaaye jaat hai.....
5:42 PM Khaara Dayan, Quater Dayan
me: Sant Kabir is writing a book on Sarru .. after death
5:43 PM he's so inspired
Sarru can make a Maulana write Urdu left to right
(then make him understand too)
5:44 PM Vadi: Sarru to OSAMA
me: e iodex laga de
ungli tod de yaar
Vadi: Why did u distroyed Twin Tower
me: tum 50 log mere left taang ki chingli khich do
5:45 PM Vadi: Osama speech less
me: Osama puked because Sarru opened his mouth
5:46 PM Vadi: Sarru: if u whould hav given me 1 yrs time, n unlimited supply of Khhara....
5:47 PM me: Ek baar Sarru commitment deta hai to .. phir .. sirf chaini khaini ke aagey jhukta hai
gaay chaap bhi chalta hai
Vadi: I whould hav jus spited on the pillars of both the towers it whould hav fell automatically
me: hahahhahaha
5:48 PM Sarru spitted something red .. then the life on earth had blood running through their bodies
Sarru ka ek massa gir gaya to Jupiter ban gaya
5:49 PM Vadi: Sarru influenced the whole generation of vampires
5:50 PM me: Sarru spitted and the vampires licked
Vadi: But the were misled by the Khhara spit as blood
me: Humans were saved
thanks Sarru
Sarru sent God on earth .. so that we do not pray him
(he's so humble)
5:51 PM Vadi: Sarru sent both Bhagavan & Paan
5:54 PM me: Sarru could not save Jesus from crucification ... usko pet me GES ban gayi thi .. woh 5 min ke liye Sandas gaya tha
5:55 PM he regrets till date .. althogh he caused the resurrection
5:56 PM Sarru's Pan ka shop servs on a PAAN India basis
5:58 PM Rajni to Sarru - you are an asshole!!
Sarru to Rajni - you are a whole ass .. i like you .. dont MIND ITT ;)
6:00 PM the verdict on Ayodhya is delayed ... the Top Brass is requesting Sarru for a permission to build his temple (a PAAN DUKAAN) on the site
6:01 PM Gita. Kuraaan, Bible etc were earlier called - Sarru the life of a Pan vala ... Sarru humbly asked to wipe his name off .... like Shri Haribansh Rai Bacchan said (बैर कराये मंदिर मस्जिद ... मेल कराये पान वाला)
6:02 PM where are you .. oh its time to pray Sarru ... me too
6:04 PM Sarru can slap a fine on fine .. and its fine with fine :)
and the fine says its fine
6:05 PM Sarru never blesses people using the left hand .. it bears the scars of preparing KHARRA with CHUNA
6:09 PM chal bhai .. time to leave
6:11 PM Vadi: Hale SARRU....
story and the blog will continue ..................
Thanks for your valuable views as the discussion is getting to hot to handle in SMS will advise our expert blogger Nissu to plz start a Blog string by the same name and contribute to all our intellectual uplifting
The comments from die hard fan's of Sarru:-
@Arpit:The movie should be globally released at shyam talkies (air cooled) Balaghat and primer party at locally admired naka par hotel garra .
@Nissu:The film could not proceed- as suicide comitted suicide after hearing that Sarru was offrd that role
@Prabhat:Hilarious man...it can also be named..tillu live
Some more views
@neeraj: sponsors are sonker panthela, bhubali hotel.
(For all the ppl from Rest of India basically Non-Balaghaties, Sonker Paanthela & Bahubali Hotel are like German Bakery & Joshi Vadewala of Pune)
Some more pearls of wisdom
@Kalu:Shyam takes Itwariganj (sistr concern of Madras takiz) proudly presents...4get Nattha, aa gaya SARRU KATTHA..Live in all comin sequels..Katangi live, Khara live, Bonkatta live, Bagadmara live, Charegaon live n Dhimartola Live.
@Mama:Dialog: 2 bund kathhe ki kimat tum kya janoo ramesh babu.
Chuna kathha maango tou pan denge bhtera maango tou gand me denge.
@Pissu:Sarru ki KATHHA kahani. hamne suni bundele harbolo ki zubani
@P Kangi: We can get the chamhar frm bus stand to craft special sharp edge shose with zip as well.
@ Ghaamu:For the upcoming movie asati chat bhandar wishes to become food & beverage partner to the movie and endorse sarru as brand embasdor for its pani puri.also pavan travels confirmed as travel partner to the movie showcasing Balaghat to the world.
Regards
Vadi
@Pissu: Kubdi Kankaria presents KALU THE RIPPER. With titlating item no. ..aurato ko izzat do ..wo bhi tumhe izzat de dengi.. Punch line - anty kapde meri hi dukaan se lena. Warna KALU phad dalenga. Also starring BILLA The Chindi villian. Brought 2 u by DODAFONE.
@Pissu:Bair karaye Mandir Masjid - mel karaye PAANVALA
@Pissu:Only one song in this wrld suits KATTHAs mood. Thehre hue paani me kankar na maar savri man me halchal si mach jaye re bavri
@Lamaha:(due to some unavoidable reasons, he was not able to send the msg so he called me up to contribute). "Sarru goes to Amaaghat with the heroin (still to be shortlisted lot of proposal's are coming from Budhi/Bhatera), some gunndas create nuisance, Sarru gets rogered but suddenly he realize that he is having khhaara from sonekar paan, he gobbles it down in 1 go and here comes the 'KAATHA MAN'
Regards
Vadi
more to come ...... KATTHA never sleeps .. KATTHA is infinite ...
Kattha's PC takes 27min & 16secs to upload (as informed by Kalya) .. it gives him the updates of Universe
